The Legend of Room 3108
Room 3108 is a legend, a myth, and a folklore of great endeavor, hardships, and pursuit. In a word, it is a shrine of the hardworking students in Fudan.
Every morning, when the sunshine penetrates into the room, the night owls wrap up their books and leave. Then, with bread in their mouths, new comers rush in for the daily lessons.
A new day begins.
In the sunny splendor of early spring, the pied magpies are showing off their sweet voice outside the window. Inside the classroom, students are working hard to fulfil their desires desires to explore the uncharted frontier of science and technology, desires to clear up the unsolved social and economic problems, desires to achieve breakthroughs of engineering, and desires to combat fatal diseases. All lives in the room are in full swing.
As the sunshine fades, the shrine reaches its climax in a day. Different lectures compete with each other on this arena.All the attention is focused on the lecturer and the applause from audience is the first award. Occasionally, a student sneaks in to occupy a seat for tomorrow"s lesson. Almost no one notices him, for all the people have their eyes fixed on every gesture,every expression and every word of the lecturer, devouring as much as they can until the emcee officially declares the conclusion of the lecture.
Then, come the night owls. Students, from freshmen to seniors, write and read, trying every means to work with high efficiency. As the midnight approaches, drowsiness would press most learners out of the room. Still, a certain number are nailed on the seats till the daybreak.
That"s Room 3108, a shrine for the hardworking knowledge seekers.
簡 評
本文用生動的筆墨描寫了3108教室中學生廢寢忘食地學習知識的情景。作者在文章開始用四個比喻來形容3108教室a legend，a myth，and a folklore ofgreat endeavor，hardships，and pursuit，a shrine of the hard working in Fudan。然後作者按時間順序展開了3108教室中一天的場景，從早上徹夜奮戰的學生疲憊地離去，直至午夜仍有不少學生抓緊分分秒秒在自習。其中，作者詳細描述了晚上在3108教室中做各種學術報告的情景，突出了學生強烈的求知欲，
本文的另一個值得一提的是作者在第三段中用了四個有desire引起的並列成分，概括了文理工醫各門學科的復旦學子都在刻苦學習，攀登高峰，3108教室隻是整個校園的一個縮影。筆建議最好能選取幾個有代表性的例子，具體地描寫他們刻苦學習的情景，做到點面結合，使文章更加有血有肉，令人信服。
(點評教師：黃鶯)